Conviction and Squirrels

Posted on by tamaraweed

At church this year, in several of my Pastor’s messages, he said we needed to use our gifts for God. So, I said okay I’d love to use my writing for God. The problem was that I didn’t want to write about what I didn’t know and understand, and I didn’t want to just throw something out there. So, I figured I’d just pray about it and tell God that I’d love to write for His Glory, but I needed to know that what I was writing was coming from Him and not me. I didn’t hear any response, but I didn’t expect God to say, “Well it’s about time, Tamara…now write this”. What I did do, however, is what I’ve learned we should do, and that’s to just keep praying about it and being open to hearing God. I prayed and I did bible study in the meantime, growing in my understanding of God’s Word.

Here’s where I’d like to tell you a little bit about me, because it might help you understand me, and this. I rescue things…which is why I have 5 dogs (I used to have 6), and 7 cats. I also rescue rodents, and insects, and birds from the cats if I can. I even have a bird I rescued in 2016 in NM. I’m a sucker for a cute furry face and yes I think mice and even rats are cute… to an extent. I stop the car and move turtles to the side of the road, I drive slower (sometimes) to make sure I don’t hit a deer, racoon, possum, turtle, or squirrel.

To me, squirrels are sweet, cute, fun little creatures. I remember feeding them peanuts as a kid at my grandparents’ house. They’re adorable. Maybe there are some of you that don’t see them that way and feel they are pests. I get that they can be. In a lot of ways though, they’re like people. Some are better behaved than others, some are shy, some bold, and some have a mischievous way about them. One thing about them that you can be sure of is that if they’re going to cross the road and a car is coming, they vacillate between going the way they are headed or going back the way they came from and they aren’t always quick to decide which way to go. Often, the decision is taken away from them by the car. I get very sad when I see a squirrel lying in the road. I get sad when I see possums, deer, racoons … anything lying in the road, but I speak specifically of squirrels because they are important to what I’m sharing with you today.

God speaks to each of his believers if we are listening. Sometimes it’s a quiet, gentle nudge of a thought, sometimes it’s a firm reprimand, and a lot of the times it’s like a good friend sitting next to you, making an observation. That’s how it was this time.

On my way to church last week, a squirrel almost darted out in front of me and at the last minute didn’t. Thank you, Lord. And then a little further up the road there was one laying in the road that had been hit. I saw it again when I went home, and again when I went back for Sunday night service…where another of our Pastors talked about conviction. And then on my way home I saw the dead squirrel in the road again and God said, “People are like squirrels in their conviction.”

You might be saying “HUH?, and some of you might already have an idea where God was leading me with this. God requires us to make a decision regarding HIM. We have free choice to make whatever decision we want, but we must decide. God wants us to choose Him and follow the path He has set out for us, or we can choose to continue down the road we’re on that guarantees a death much like the flattened squirrel in the road. Our time for decision making can be taken away from us in an instant; in other words, if you vacillate between making that decision, that decision will at some point, be taken away from you; by a car, or cancer perhaps – something. That was the other thing he shared with me, that we don’t know how long we have. It could be 10 years, a few weeks, or a day. I know the older we get, the more we know this, but when we’re younger we don’t necessarily see it.

Anyway, I hope that now, when you see a squirrel after this, you might see them differently, or at least be reminded of what I’ve shared. Hopefully you’ll slow down a bit and not be the person/car to make the final decision for that squirrel if it happens to run this way and that in front of you. More importantly, if you haven’t been convicted in your decision for Christ, perhaps you’ll see a squirrel and remember that time is running out. Don’t be a squirrel. Don’t vacillate on the road of life between Jesus and the path you’re on now without Him. Just like for the squirrel, when that decision is taken away, there is no second chance.

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Faith and Doubt

Posted on by tamaraweed

“The funny thing about doubt is you can’t control its comings and goings.  But faith is stronger than doubt because you control faith.”  Gene Ho, Trumpography 2018

So if God gives us what we need, even when we fight it every step of the way, why doesn’t that include an abundance of faith.  I mean, we need that, don’t we?  For me the answer is double sided. No HE doesn’t just give us faith; we have to seek him for it, and then once we do, Yes HE will give us an abundance of faith. 

We ask God for a lot.  We ask HIM for security, health, (for us and others), safety, joy, peace, no more pain, healing . . . etc. 

God asks one thing of us: To have faith that HE is there and loves us, forgives us, and will answer our prayers. Within that faith, HE expects us to live by his rules, even when he knows we most likely will fail.

You’d think that with all we ask of HIM, we should be able to have an abundance of faith once we seek him out.  But we don’t, at least not at first, and sometimes even after we think we do, something traumatic happens in our lives and we lose our faith, or turn away from it because we’re hurting, angry, and mostly because we don’t understand.  We question God.  How could HE let this happen?  We feel HE has failed us, or let us down.  We trusted HIM with our faith, but what good is our faith if HE’s going to take our loved ones, or let something horrible happen.

So why do we question HIM?  Where did that warm fuzzy, wonderful feeling of joy in our new found faith go?

I believe that because God gave us free will, HE can’t just reach down and give us an abundance of faith.  Instead HE wants us to come to HIM through Jesus, and in that journey we learn more about our God.  As we learn more about HIM our faith starts out like a seedling, breaking through the surface and feeling the warmth of the sun, and it feels marvelous. Some of us stop there . . . we’ve accepted Jesus into our hearts and we have faith that it’s going to be all good now. 

God doesn’t want us to stop there, nor should we.  Instead when our seedling feels the warmth of the sun, we should keep striving to learn more.  As we learn more, our faith gets nourishment from God, and it grows taller and stronger. So God doesn’t automatically give us faith, but when we strive to know HIM, faith weaves itself into the fabric of our being, and is strengthened by HIS nourishment in our lives.

Satan casts doubts, like acid on our faith, in an attempt to turn us away from God. We can’t control what Satan throws at us, nor can we control when.  Satan is always whispering, especially to those he feels are close to God, and we may not hear that whispering every day, but then wham – his whispers get louder and suddenly those acidic doubts start making us feel less than.  We can, however, control our faith.  When doubt is cast into our life, that’s the time to draw even closer to God; using our faith as a shield against our doubts.

I believe Satan has been working overtime casting doubt within me lately about a certain thing in my life.  It doesn’t matter what the specific thing is, but it’s a big part of me and the doubt has been fairly intense.  Because of my faith in God, I remind myself that the doubt Satan is casting is false.  I am in control of my faith.  I have placed every part of my life into God’s hands and God will decide the outcome.  Satan doesn’t get to.